Denise Ho and Anthony Wong on Coming Out

Singer-songwriters Denise Ho (何韻詩) and Tat Ming Pair (達明一派) member Anthony Wong (黃耀明) recently appeared on Maria Chung’s (鍾慧冰) i-Cable show, POV Today <今日觀點>, to talk about their experiences of growing up gay and their thoughts on officially coming out to the Hong Kong public for the first time last year.

Both Denise and Anthony admitted that they were aware of their sexuality since they were young teenagers. Anthony said,“I was beginning to figure it out when I entered junior secondary school. I felt guilty.… I tried dating female classmates, but that just made me realize that I was really gay. The hardest part was figuring out how to tell my mother.”

Maria expressed that as a mother herself, she can understand how Anthony’s mother must have felt when he confessed to her. “I’m honestly not sure if I could accept that myself,” said Maria.

Denise nodded in agreement. “When I came out, I was worried about how my fans and parents would react, so I issued a public statement to them. Thankfully, my parents are rather liberal. They never gave me pressure. I actually never really told them. My mom and dad were actually one of the last ones to find out. They didn’t know until I came out publicly.”

The 36-year-old said that she believed her mother already had some idea of her sexuality when she was in high school. “When I was fifteen years old and studying in Canada, I was already noticing that I liked the same sex. I didn’t know what to do. I heard about an institution that could provide me some details of [homosexuality], so I filled out the form. I was stupid enough to write in my home address, so my mother knew.”

On how she found out that she was a lesbian, Denise said, “When you can’t stop thinking about that certain someone, then you will know.”

Nonetheless, Denise expressed that she hopes to experience pregnancy and giving birth. She joked that she should borrow some sperm from “healthy swimmer” Anthony Wong!

Denise said, “I like women. It’s not like I want to become a man. In the past I never understood marriage, but in the past five years, I’ve seen many friends getting married and having kids. It makes me want to experience that too. I want to get pregnant.”

Denise and Anthony expressed their wish for a more accepting and open-minded society in the future. “In the ideal world, no one should have the need to come out.”


This article is written by Addy for

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  1. ““In the ideal world, no one should have the need to come out.””

    And there is the dilemma. Why then are they “coming out” if they feel there should never be any need to “coming out”? There is no ideal world. To many, the ideal world is a world where everyone is perfectly heterosexual, to some their ideal world is quite different. In whose eyes are we speaking about ideal world? This will take time for acceptance. First step is parents. If they’re ok, then half the battle is done. The rest you can drum it into their head to accept, etc but frankly you can’t force what is ingrained into our heads for so many centuries. Change takes time. I am sorry to say this but it does. But when it does, in years to come this change will be so ingrained in society’s consciousness that one day perhaps a perfectly heterosexual person will be forced to accept a perfectly bisexual partner and perhaps there will be another movement called “Choose one preference only” society or something like that. It could happen.

  2. Good for them to come out, but even in USA, most gay actors are done after they come out. But you can’t live for others but yourself. Be who you are and not what others want you to be.

    1. Oh, I don’t know… Neil Patrick Harris might have something to say about that. 😉

    2. Include matt bomer and jim parsons, who won his third Emmy today.

    3. Anderson Cooper, Ellen DeGeneres, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Sir Ian McKellen, Jodie Foster, among many. If you are really talented, it doesn’t matter.

      If you are insecure, doesn’t matter how talented or rich you are, you’ll still hide, such as John Travolta, Tom Cruise, and Kevin Spacey, to name a few.

      1. “John Travolta, Tom Cruise, and Kevin Spacey”

        Kevin Spacey is sorta confirmed without confirming it. Travolta is still debatable, he could be those who likes both ways. Mow Tom Cruise… I don’t think he is gay. I think he has Andy Lau Complex by his obsession with having wives he can control. BUT he could be also enjoying some loving time with his no. 2 man or is it no. 1 in the whole religious order?

        Is Tom Hardy gay or former gay? Who else… definitely not george clooney. He just doesn’t want to get married, ever.

      2. Sorta kinda surprised by Ben Winshaw coming out but should have guessed. So Q may have the hots for Bond. I still like him though.

        What about Chinese stars? Can’t be that few names?

      3. Feel like the subject is harder to broach in Asian societies where the very basic of notion of sex is rarely talked about in public format.

      4. Tom Hardy experimented, so he says. Same with Angelina Jolie.
        Tom Cruise and John Travolta are so “in the closet.” I work with enough people from crew in productions to confirm that.

      5. Let me add one more. =0(
        Wentworth Miller
        OMG, such a damn waste ahahha LOL…I still can’t believe it. Too damn hot to be gay hahaha lol…
        But why is it that ppl always say below 3 are gay? What’s the deal w/them so ppl r saying their marriages are all a fake or a cover up? ahhaah LOL…John Travolta, Tom Cruise, and Kevin Spacey.

      6. Years ago there a british magazine was about to publish pictures proving Tom Cruise was gay, but he was able to sue the magazine and therefore, those pictures were never published

      7. I have never heard of Jodie Foster being lesbian before. IS she???

      8. Yes she is. She in fact came out on TV in I can’t remember which award show.

    4. I meant movie career. TV is a different world, it’s where all the gay actors can still find work. When was the last time a gay male got a leading role in a movie?

      1. @Nick,
        omg, you are absolutely right. I cannot recall any leading gay male actors in hollywood movies. I didn’t even realize this till reading ur comment.

      2. @ick, the last time gay men got leading roles in Movies, especially romantic lead roles, was in the days of Montgomery Cliff, Rock Hudson, Cary Grant and James Dean, just o name a few.

        In those days, these guys stayed in the closet, acted all tough and suave, and even had marriages that the movie studies arranged for them, of course.
        There will always be a stigma to being gay, even in Hollywood, and 100 more in the Asian entertainment industry.

    5. @Nick,
      That’s why they don’t reveal it until they are at least a bit established in the industry. I remember Wentworth Miller was also playing the straight card while he was still HOT in Prison Break.
      You are absolutely right, perhaps that’s why WM while rejecting russia’s offer and simultaneously revealing his orientation at the same time. But for WM, he was never in great film demand anyway so I guess by him revealing it, it’s not a great loss for him but just a shock for confirming it. Haha…
      That’s why all those women who wanted MATT BOMER to play the movie adaptation of Fifty Shades of Grey, directors/producers and whoever else will NEVER cast an openly gay guy to play a straight. The fantasy is gone so how will they bank in if they that risk? NO way and it’s called REALITY.

  3. It must hve taken a massive load of their shoulders after coming out. Am happy and supportive of you both. Be true to who you are.

  4. they seem very fortunate – there must be lesser educated, working class gays and lesbians in HK who are really suffering like those not too attractive dudes who ride the subway after midnight with makeup on.

  5. Add George Clooney, Justin Timberlake, and Justin Beiber to the bisexual, or being with women to hide their true sexuality list.

    There are a lot in Asian entertainment, but whenever myself or anyone mention any of them, we get cursed out.

  6. As long as they are happy and they are not doing anything stupid I am okay with this.

  7. actually i’m tired of denise over promoting her gay sexuality too much. so she’s gay, so what? why don’t she just focus on making music? or is she taking advantage of this to promote herself through her sexuality? i have some gay friends and they’re not as attention seeker like denise.

    1. I agree, it does seem everytime when we do hear about her it’s about her being a lesbian. haha…I always get confused w/her and Candy Lo as well… I don’t know why but they look the same to me…

    2. Denise is a public figure and maybe she is doing to help others who are afraid to come out of closet??? But I do agree that she should focus on making music and other things instead of just her sexuality all the time. It is great that she is willing to admit it but there is not a need to talk about it all the time.

      1. Yes, why talk about munching Candy when you can talk about music or films…

  8. IMHO, there’s no need to come out of the closet; my sexual orientation is no one’s business, thank you. If you need to come out of the closet, it implies that you have something to hide. Anyway, while i feel that these artistes’ sexual preference is their business, i don’t really like how they seem to be flaunting their homosexuality like a badge of honor. It’s nothing to be ashamed of but nothing to be proud of either. I honestly felt that their coming out video was in bad taste.

  9. Yes both of them should just focus on their music instead of keep talking about their sexuality and keep fighting for the rights of LGBT which indirectly is promoting it.

  10. Why do they feel the need to come out? Well, some of the comments here with judgemental overtones is exactly why.

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